M Y wife and I have a prevailing difference of opinion, which every so often rears it’s head in our marriage. It’s this:

She likes Bon Jovi. I can’t stand Bon Jovi.

Let me go back a few years.

Bon Jovi released a song called It’s My Life. It reconnected the ageing rocker with a youth audience and re-established the band on top of the charts as one of rock’s hottest tickets. The song references Frank Sinatra’s My Way (both Bon Jovi and Sinatra are New Jerseyans) and spearheaded the sales of the album Crush, which sold over two million copies in the U.S. alone.

In other words, it was a big deal. It tapped into an ideology – which has always been around – that said “I am in control of my life and I can make it happen”. The thinking was: I am master of my own destiny. I can do it my way. I am independent.

It’s the American dream… the rags-to-riches fairytale that we all get inspired by.

Here’s the thing though: it’s a crap idea.


And it completely tainted my perception of Jon Bon Jovi.

Okay all you Bon Jovi fans… I will admit that I am older now than I was when we first got married, and so I’m more chilled about Bon Jovi the artist.

I would go to his concert were I to be offered tickets, and I have massive respect for any artist who can stay mainstream for as long as he has. That takes some doing.

And his guitarist Richie Sambora is genius, in my opinion.

But here’s what’s on my mind:

You can’t control your life. The sooner we realise that, the sooner we’ll all be better off.

I’m talking about the big issues. I’m not talking about paying your electricity account or deciding on what you’re going to make for dinner. I’m talking about life and death stuff, what you actually do with your life and who you’re living for, your legacy…

It’s about independence. It’s about being the boss of our own life. Problem is that in the grander scheme of eternity, none of us is a very good boss.

This issue of control and independence is an interesting one, because I think its an idea that surges into the heart of The Great Deep, and what this blog and this musical project are all about.

I have realised, over the past few years, that I am not independent. And there are very few big issues I can control. And actually, I don’t want to control them. But I do want to get to know the One who does.

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